有位心理学家曾写道,一个成熟称得上真爱的恋情必须经过四个阶段,那就是:
Codependent→Counterdependent→Independent→Interdependent
阶段之间转换所需的时间不一定,因人而易。
第一个阶段:共存。
这是热恋时期,情人不论何时何地总希望能腻在一起。
第二个阶段:反依赖。
等到情感稳定后,至少会有一方想要有多一点自己的时间作自己想做的事,这时另一方就会感到被冷落。
第三个阶段:独立。
这是第二个阶段的延续,要求更多独立自主的时间。
第四个阶段:共生。
这时新的相处之道已经成形,你的他(她)已经成为你最亲的人。
你们在一起相互扶持、一起开创属于你们自己的人生。你们在一起不会互相牵绊,而会互相成长。
但是,大部分的人都通不过第二或第三阶段,而选择分手一途,这是非常可惜的。
很多事只要好好沟通都会没事的,不要耍个性,不要想太多要互相信任,这样第二、三阶段的时间就会缩短。
和所爱的人相遇相恋是非常不容易的,不要轻言放弃。
两人相聚是因为有缘,相知是因为有心,真的得好好珍惜这福份莫说分手不是无由,希望看到上述的四个阶段,真能给大家一些启示与领悟并惜缘。
我们会逐渐变成我们所爱的人。
你和他本来没有相同之处,外表不相像,性格也是南辕北辙,一旦爱上了,年深日久,你会惊讶你的眼睛有点像他的眼睛,他的微笑也有点像你的微笑。
你们走路的步伐也有点相似,说话的语气也愈来愈相像。他的脖子上有一颗痣,一天,你发现自己脖子上也多了一颗痣,原来我们会变成我们所爱的人。
你本来喜欢脚踏实地的人,而他一向比较轻佻,但你们爱上了,他竟会不知不觉变成一个老实人,这个改变,连他自己也不曾察觉。
他本来喜欢活泼的女孩子,却爱上了拘谨的你,这些日子,你竟愈来愈活泼,你差点认不出自己。我们会逐渐变成对方理想中的人,这种改变,绝对不是刻意的。两个人愈爱得长久,气质也愈来愈相近,你曾经以为他不是你梦寐以求的那种类型,然而,有一天,你惊讶地发现,他已经变成你喜欢的那种类型,你不必再到处寻觅,他就是你要找的人。
深深爱着一个人的时候,你原来真的会一点一点的失去自己,为什么你还会觉得快乐呢?
大概是因为你在失去的当儿,也是赚了,你把他的气质和他的微笑都赚回来...
幸福生活很单纯...
JADELUN
2011年3月31日星期四
杯与水的love...
你有时是不是这样,当一切转淡的时候就想到放弃,到最后才知道原来自已一直寻寻觅觅的已经在身边,但是,放弃了,就再没有机会再拥有……
杯子:“我寂寞,我需要水,给我一点水吧”
主人:“好吧,拥有了想要的水,你就不寂寞了吗?”
杯子:“应该是吧。”
主人把开水倒进了杯子里。
水很热,杯子感到自已快被融化了。杯子想,这就是爱情的力量吧。
水变温了,杯子感到很舒服。杯子想,这就是生活的感觉吧。
水变凉了,杯子害怕了,怕什么他也不知道。杯子想,就是失去的滋味吧。
水凉透了,杯子绝望了。杯子想,这就是缘份的“杰作”吧。
杯子:“主人,快把水倒出来,我不需要了。”
主人不在。杯子感到自已压抑死了,可恶的水,凉凉的,放在心里,感觉好难过。
杯子奋力一晃,水终于走出了杯子的心里,杯子好开心。突然,杯子掉在地上。
杯子碎了,临死前,看见了它心里的每一个地方都有水的痕迹。它才知道,它爱水,它是如此的爱水,可是,它再也无法把水完整的放在心里了。
杯子哭了,它的眼泪和水溶在一起,奢望着能用最后的力量再去爱水一次。
仔细去想~~爱情~~其实长着一样的模样~~~
杯子:“我寂寞,我需要水,给我一点水吧”
主人:“好吧,拥有了想要的水,你就不寂寞了吗?”
杯子:“应该是吧。”
主人把开水倒进了杯子里。
水很热,杯子感到自已快被融化了。杯子想,这就是爱情的力量吧。
水变温了,杯子感到很舒服。杯子想,这就是生活的感觉吧。
水变凉了,杯子害怕了,怕什么他也不知道。杯子想,就是失去的滋味吧。
水凉透了,杯子绝望了。杯子想,这就是缘份的“杰作”吧。
杯子:“主人,快把水倒出来,我不需要了。”
主人不在。杯子感到自已压抑死了,可恶的水,凉凉的,放在心里,感觉好难过。
杯子奋力一晃,水终于走出了杯子的心里,杯子好开心。突然,杯子掉在地上。
杯子碎了,临死前,看见了它心里的每一个地方都有水的痕迹。它才知道,它爱水,它是如此的爱水,可是,它再也无法把水完整的放在心里了。
杯子哭了,它的眼泪和水溶在一起,奢望着能用最后的力量再去爱水一次。
仔细去想~~爱情~~其实长着一样的模样~~~
2011年3月22日星期二
spm result....
对我来说今天是最不幸运的一天...
我所希望的事情都没能实现...
我是怎么了??
怎么spm成绩跟预考result不一样的??
when i get my result.... 我感觉很sad....
之前那么hardworking.....
but 成绩出来..并不是我想要的成绩....
虽然spm成绩不是很好.....
但是也不是很烂....
haiz....
一言难尽...
我的感受一时说不上来...
所以....就这样....
我所希望的事情都没能实现...
我是怎么了??
怎么spm成绩跟预考result不一样的??
when i get my result.... 我感觉很sad....
之前那么hardworking.....
but 成绩出来..并不是我想要的成绩....
虽然spm成绩不是很好.....
但是也不是很烂....
haiz....
一言难尽...
我的感受一时说不上来...
所以....就这样....
2011年3月17日星期四
恐怖....
11/3/2011
Earthquake & tsunami hit Japan
Rising casualties
8.9 levels of earthquakes!!!
Was so powerful
I'm here for Japanese disaster ? name I pray
2011.5.21 the end of the world?
Now everyone in Internet circulated
Everyone was afraid to worry
Are in regret
It is all too late
Everybody so afraid of the end of their world
Why did you not do his bit?
Take care of the earth
Not disorderly cut down trees
Don't let it ill?
Is because the human actions
World will sick...
If this doomsday just rumors
I hope everyone later take care of the earth
Don't very close to death just afraid of regret it.....
Earthquake & tsunami hit Japan
Rising casualties
8.9 levels of earthquakes!!!
Was so powerful
I'm here for Japanese disaster ? name I pray
2011.5.21 the end of the world?
Now everyone in Internet circulated
Everyone was afraid to worry
Are in regret
It is all too late
Everybody so afraid of the end of their world
Why did you not do his bit?
Take care of the earth
Not disorderly cut down trees
Don't let it ill?
Is because the human actions
World will sick...
If this doomsday just rumors
I hope everyone later take care of the earth
Don't very close to death just afraid of regret it.....
2011年3月16日星期三
i wanted u..
Lately I've been thinking about what I can do
I've been stressing to fall back in love with you
I'm so sorry that I couldn't follow through
But I can't go on this way. I've got to stop it babe
You've been wonderful in all that you can be
But it hurts when you say that you understand me
So believe me. I, I am sorry, I, I am sorry, I, I
I wanted you to be there when I fall
I wanted you to see me through it all
I wanted you to be the one I loved
I wanted you, I wanted you
I wanted you to hold me in my sleep
I wanted you to show me what I need
I wanted you to know just how down deep
I wanted you, I wanted you
I've been pushing hard to open up the door
Trying to take us back to where we were before
But I'm done. I just can't do this anymore
Cuz we can't be mended, so let's stop pretending now
We've been walking around in circles for some time
And I think we should head for the finish line
So believe me. I, I am sorry, I, I am sorry, I, I
I've been stressing to fall back in love with you
I'm so sorry that I couldn't follow through
But I can't go on this way. I've got to stop it babe
You've been wonderful in all that you can be
But it hurts when you say that you understand me
So believe me. I, I am sorry, I, I am sorry, I, I
I wanted you to be there when I fall
I wanted you to see me through it all
I wanted you to be the one I loved
I wanted you, I wanted you
I wanted you to hold me in my sleep
I wanted you to show me what I need
I wanted you to know just how down deep
I wanted you, I wanted you
I've been pushing hard to open up the door
Trying to take us back to where we were before
But I'm done. I just can't do this anymore
Cuz we can't be mended, so let's stop pretending now
We've been walking around in circles for some time
And I think we should head for the finish line
So believe me. I, I am sorry, I, I am sorry, I, I
叙述jadeluin....
感情?爱情?
Recently a let me troubling thing... There is a known girl said suddenly like me... Want to be with me... Clam???? . I hear the.. So surprised... I never thought she would like me... The more bold told me to vindicate... Really scary!!! It seems that I still pretty attractive... Haha... Although I am not handsome boy... But it's not very ugly?? Hahaha...
XD....
XD....
On the other hand... Although you told me to vindicate... But... I cannot accept your... After all, I've hurt a very very love my girls... That is my sin this case... Hurt her.. So I will then decide to read... Feelings... Wait me heart mature, stable before going to me... Because I don't want to hurt another girl... Of course... You said you don't care about my past... Don't care I hurt my former girlfriend... But the question is... I hate my own... Hurt so nice girls... She to I did many let me very surprise...
So you will understand... I wouldn't accept your... Because I'm not a good man... You and I together is not happy... To find other boys... Outside the handsome guy is... Don't need ?
Work... Erm... Said to work... I have already don't work... Bcoz the SPM result would promulgate.. so I want to rest... After all, I work is full whole month do... Have no time to rest... So cough up... Of course want to use 1 months time to recharge.. a good thinking about my future the way.. This move played there cannot be any slacking.. Must step by step walk slowly.. In case there is any mistakes... My life plans would like 【 兵败如山倒 】... I don't want it.. After all, I'm the only child in my family.. I later will make money? Daddy n mammy filial... Haha... Say to myself is a big filial son... Haha... I don't know that I recently would think so... Maybe I grow up... Will want to... It seems that I jadelun 【 朱董 】... Has changed... off
订阅:
博文 (Atom)